11 - Leaving the Master, first time around.

Blog 11 – “Leaving the Master, first time around.”

I was one of only 4 Senior Ride with Your Mind (RWYM) Coaches in the world for nearly 10 years - but I choose to no longer be actively involved in the RWYM world.  

I learned a huge amount from Mary and it is, in great part, thanks to her that I am still in horses to this day.  

Whether directly or indirectly Mary’s work empowered me to discover the world of rider biomechanics and what learning is - and what it is not.

Without training with Mary I would not have learned how to learn or how to coach.

I would never have gained the understanding I have today about the interface of the interaction between horse and rider, as Mary might say, “The rider as cause and the horse as effect.”

Becoming a certified, successful and happy RWYM coach was a challenge.

It took years of work, hours of research, and required that I start again, and again as a rider - and the decision to leave was a big and important one.  

I hadn’t worked really worked hard for anything in my life before.  

Sure, I’d grafted, put in time and effort, but not really, really worked for anything.  

I enjoyed doing things that came easily to me (there were only a few, but I enjoyed them).  

And anything that was difficult (mostly I am referring to my formal education) I never really bothered with.  

That meant that I had never really lost anything I’d worked for either.  

I didn’t have to work really hard for my BHS qualifications, I hardly use anything that I learned within that system today and yet I will remain BHS qualified until the day that I die.  

However, walk away from RWYM and all those qualifications are stripped from you.  

I do not resent this, I think it’s right and proper that if you are not going for on-going training with someone then they cannot over-see and monitor what you are doing and I am not criticising Mary for doing this and only mention it to highlight one of the costs paid in taking this decision.

I’ve never been an “easy” person to get along with.

Although I have learned being “difficult” or “easy” are entirely dependent upon other people’s labels.  

My Mum thinks I’m difficult, she has always said that I go looking for trouble, I say it as it is, call people and myself out and don’t have much of a filter between brain and gob. 

A lot of people would agree with her. 

My husband says that because I say it as it is, call people and myself out and don’t have much of a filter between brain and gob I am “easy” to live with and to understand. 

Some people agree with him - I think. 

I sit somewhere in the middle, I’d say I’m difficult easy.

There was a lot of shock within the RWYM world when I left.  

While there was some disharmony, bitching and dissatisfaction within the group there was also a lot sharing, learning, and discovering, which I am sure continues to this day.  

But if anyone is going to raise their head above the parapet it’s likely to be me so there should not have been any surprise when I left given the issues that I had raised and which were not resolved over the years.

However I wish Mary continued success and the recognition that her work deserves.

From there I have gone on to explore lots of different equine training systems including, amongst others, classical and clicker training and various forms of bodywork before discovering the life-changing effects of Functional Patterns www.functionalpatterns.com  (Details here for F.P (The 4 P's at Ashen E.C)


Next time - "There's Always a Reason" published 12th March.

For those searching online for more “instructional” resources than offered in these blogs please make use of my video downloads www.ashenec.co.uk

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